Tuesday, 27 October 2009

Head Space

I’m not in a good head space this day, this week, this month. I’m not coping. I’ve got too much on. I am organising a kids’ play, stage managing another play and trying to improve my health and fitness. Trying to teach dad how to write an essay. Listening to everyone’s problems. I have a pile of books to read, but no time. In addition work is being ‘interesting’, and I’m not sure if I’ve done the ethical thing. I thought that it was the ethical thing when I did it, but in hindsight maybe not. And one of my colleagues seems to have stopped talking to me and is avoiding me. And I’ve gone and let someone annoy me, and this has really really really effected me. Last time this happened I stopped going to the Last Tuesday Society and became a bit of a hermit. I need a high quality hot chocolate (I think the caffeine in coffee is making me worse) and a Good Chat with my Good Friends, and perhaps I also need to get lost in a good book.

I don’t want to give up the plays, because it makes me feel saner when I am involved in plays, and I don’t want to let any one down. My name is Andrew and I'm a doormat. I don’t want to stop my exercise routine because my osteoporosis has improved by about 12% which is, to quote my specialist, ‘bloody fantastic’. She said that in two more years I should be able to stop taking osteoporosis medicine (technically it is not osteoporosis, just the same symptoms – ie pretty shocking bones). A 4% improvement is on the good side of average, and the large change the specialist put down to me exercising.

What can I do?
- I’ve told Julian and Chantell that I’m not feeling 100% at this moment in time, and other important people will read this.
- I’ll either visit Chantell this weekend or go on a reading and coffee drive through Victoria, I might go Geohashing (Yes I did spell that correct) or retro-Geohashing.
- I’ll ask the director if I can always leave early on Monday nights, that way hopefully the rest of my week won’t feel as bad.
- I want to blog every day in November, but that might give me too much stress, so it might be a photo a day, or a quote and I won’t worry if I miss a day. I won’t officially join NaBloPoMo.
- I will eat less biscuits and chocolate and drink less coffee.
- I will eat more fruit, drink more water and remember to have dinner.
- I will clean my car.
- I will put on rubber gloves and search the peke for fleas (If I have time).

And to make matters worse, I don’t think that I can trust my doctor: all of her patients are sick.

No comments: